By Avi Sato
OK here’s my confession…
I’m a she-devil. I admit it. Everything GOP candidate Courtland Sykes of Missouri hates in a woman, that’s me. It’s ok, though. He already has selected his woman and, oh the sadness, I was never in the running for his oh-so-manly affections.
Posting on his official campaign page “Courtland Sykes for Senate” this week, this paragon of pro-Trump, pro-MAGA, pro-gun, anti-abortion, pro-wall Republican machismo and conservatism-gone-infectious called feminism a “crazed definition of modern womanhood”.
He went on, in an excerpt from an eleven-page treatise he lovingly crafted for the benefit of all men and women still living in the thirteenth century, that “men and women are different, and gender-bending word games by a goofy nest of drugstore academics aren’t going to change anything”.
He demands of his not-yet-long-suffering fiancée (oh that lucky woman, she!), Chanel Rion, only one thing.
“I want to come home to a home cooked dinner at six every night, one that she fixes and one that I expect one day to have my daughters learn to fix after they become traditional homemakers and family wives.”
He staunchly doesn’t “want them [growing] up into career obsessed banshees who [give up] home life and children and the happiness of family to become nail-biting manophobic hell-bent feminist she devils”, ignoring, of course, that manophobic isn’t a word and is also far too long for for a GOP document anyway, as Trump will need one of his aides to help him sound it out.
We feminists, according to Sykes, “made it up to suit their own nasty, snake-filled heads” – he is pretty clear about stating that he means we made up oppression of women, inequality, and societal gender roles, among some other things — like the right of a man to be given physical comfort by his wife. Sorry, I almost swooned there for a second.
The snakes in my head are telling me that this is a man who truly symbolizes the modern-day Republican party. And they ain’t wrong.
Sadly, Mr Sykes, my fellow “nail-biting manophobic hell-bent feminist she devils who shriek from the top of a thousand tall buildings” are just going to scream louder and fight harder.
It appears he is mounting a challenge to Democratic Senator Claire McCaskill, albeit perhaps not much of one. Perhaps she declined to step down and assist with his dinner preparations and this is his payback joke?
I can only hope this is all some sort of joke to prove to the world that the GOP has a sense of humor, and satire is alive and well. Otherwise, someone really needs to tell Mr Sykes, the she-devils of Missouri are going to kick his ass out of the polling stations.
Is Republicanism really just the refuge for misogyny and ancient gender stereotypes now? Oh, right. Trump’s President. My bad, I shouldn’t have imagined otherwise.